More Thanh Words

"My name is Thanh and I'm a Blogger". Now that I have admitted to that, I can say that I'm a stereotypical "geeky" Engineer who enjoys sci-fi books and movies and into all things technological. I also love music and have a passion for FOOD. I'm a social person and like to talk to people. I hate people who are fake or overly aggressive. If you're also into some serious discussion, with a pinch of sarcasm and a dash of real emotion, then please read on.

Wednesday, December 06, 2006

Male Bonding

Males don't normally get together to have bonding sessions like women. I find that there are a few occasions when males do bond. Here are my experiences on when guys feel a unified bond.

The first and most obvious time when males bond is playing in a sport team. I have to say that it is cliche but the fact that you have to play as a team means that you do have to bond. Last season, our soccer team all really pulled together towards the end of the season and there was a real sense of unity as we strived towards our first ever premiership.

Outdoor trips such as camping also causes men to bond together. Toughing it in the wilderness and having to be self sustaning (or close to it) tends to bring people closer. Unlike the sport scenario where you are all working towards winning, camping ignites our survival instincts and the need to cooperate to survive. I remember one time when we were trying to put up a tent and everyone really pitched in to help.

At uni, the times where male bonding was greatest was when we were doing assignments and studying for exams. The late nights at the library where a whole massive group of us would be studying and helping each other out on assignments really meant everyone bonded. There was the fast food dinners and snacks everywhere, the telling of jokes and stories, and just aiming to finish something that required everyone's input.

At work, I have recently had to work weekends and late nights with my group. I have found that on those occasions, I have really gotten to know them a lot more as people. The atmosphere is much more relaxed after work hours and people are more themselves and that generally means they are a lot sillier. We are geeky engineers after all. There was a lot of joking going on and I saw personalities of people that I never see during work hours, especially from the more senior members. I guess there is an expectation during work hours to act a particualar way, but outside of work hours and in the company of people you can trust, true personalities come out. The bonding was again due to striving to achieve a common goal and finish the project. Everyone chips in where they can.

With all these activities where males bond, it doesn't mean there aren't arguments and disagreements. That also occurs since people have different ideas on how to do things. In the end though, those arguments are usually resolved so that the common goal can be achieved.


Blogger Girl Kae said...

males bond best when drunk i find :) there's the touching, the hugging, the depressed drunk, the angry drunk - it all comes out when a boy is drunk :)

12/08/2006 2:22 AM  
Blogger afrobev said...

Men are just so much more easy going though. There's no hard feelings if you dont get in touch with a male mate after a couple of weeks. Blokes tend to just get on with it and not take things as personal as girls tend to. Our laid back ways can be very frustrating in regards to other things though.

Of course Im biased :)

12/09/2006 1:03 AM  
Blogger A-la-la-la-n said...

Yep! Kae mentioned it already, the drunken bonding is a huge part of being a male. Coz then the morning after you can get together and laugh about the antics the night before.

But a good entry! Especially the exam study one which i recently i had. Great way to bond.

Sports teams makes some very very strong bonds especially when you TRAIN together. And nothing beats winning with a team. Solo efforts are good but to share it with ur friends is gold.

12/09/2006 2:34 AM  
Blogger thanh7580 said...

Kae, I couldn't agree with you more. I missed out that one. Drunk guys do tend to be much more touchy feely.

James, I also agree with you too. The laid back attitudes means things situations don't get too aggrevated. But yes, the laid back ways also means things don't get done either.

Alan, the stories the next day is always hilarious. They usually go along the lines of "I ended up throwing up in the toilet and sleeping in the bath tub" or "Did you see how drunk .... was and how he tripped over and hit his head".

Studying really gets everyone working together. As for the sports, training again helps you all to get closer and then the winning feeling is so great.

12/09/2006 5:59 PM  
Blogger mishmash said...

hahahha drunk stories are hilarious!

Thanh, great post. It just amplified the difference between how men & women bond. I mean, can you imagine men bonding over hours of shopping? :)

12/09/2006 10:38 PM  
Blogger A-la-la-la-n said...

Yeh Misch is totally on the ball about the difference but some of these SNAGs whoa re leftover from the 90's and Metro's do it.

What have they done to the social image of men?

12/11/2006 1:54 AM  
Blogger thanh7580 said...

Mish and Alan, generally guys don't go shopping together unless its for some electronic gadget or to buy some sporting equipment. I used to go shopping with my friends for clothes once a year during the huge post Christmas sales.

The social image of men has really changed. There's even cosmetics aimed at men now. I was a little shocked when I found out on the weekend that my cousin used all these face creams and stuff. It wasn't just moisturiser but all these specific products to do different things to his skin. Hmmmm, waste of money in my opinion but its not my money.

12/11/2006 7:24 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

A blog about you bonding with other males!

That's disturbing.

3/06/2008 9:40 AM  

Post a Comment

<< Home