Slowly Mending Bridges

Once you burn a bridge (metaphorically of course, don't go trying to burn a real bridge), it is extremely hard to repair. Here is an article on how to avoid it in the first place. Most of it comes down to communication and trying to hold one's emotions in tact. That is easier said than done.

A few months ago, I wrote about burning a bridge with a friend and how quickly it happened. That bridge is still under major damage and is only slowly being repaired. At the time when I wrote the post, we were still civil to each other and would still talk fairly regularly. But it was clearly evident that we no longer had the same friendship. We slowly but surely started to avoid each other, and those awkward conversations about the weather got fewer and fewer. Only when we bumped into each other would we talk.

I found that avoiding this person was very hard and so awkward. We would avoid eye contact and clearly walk past each other pretending not to see the other person sometimes. I have since forgiven what this person had said to me, but I haven't forgotten. It's not that I don't want to forget or even think about it at all, but deep in my mind, every time I see him, I feel like I just can't trust him fully.

Of late, we've started talking a little, but I'm still hesistant to talk more with him as I always think that the same things as in the past will occur and we'll just argue over the same issues again. It's amazing how long trust takes to develop, but you can lose trust in people so quickly. I find that I just can't tell this person who used to be one of my best friends anything anymore, in fear of it being used against me.

Hopefully I will be able to forget the events of the past enough to become friends again with this person. If not, I think I have learnt some valuable lessons on how to deal with other arguments in the future and hopefully prevent a burning of the bridges so quickly.